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Here we go again. Another week and another round of awful films. What can I say, there are so many bad films out there that I think it will be hard to stop this entire series. Keep doing the bad movie thing Hollywood. I will keep this wonderful series going like the Energizer Bunny.
Movie 43 (2013)
Have you ever seen a movie that has a massive cast and sucks so bad? That movie is Movie 43. A shit storm, dumpster fire of a movie that it is extremely hard to watch. The film consists of fourteen different storylines, yes, you read that right, fourteen freakin stories and each one was directed by a different director. They all sucked ass. Don’t even waste your time watching this film and watch Movie 44 instead.
Showtime (2002)
Rush Hour was a great buddy cop film. Showtime, on the other hand, should’ve not been made nor had the camera rolling. How does a movie starring Eddie Murphy AND Robert De Niro be this bad? It had to be a spoof on all the reality TV crap in the world. That is what the movie is about with very few laughs and a shitty plot.
Anaconda 3: Offspring (2008)
The first Anaconda film was okay, but it was a box office hit. I really enjoyed it growing up and it made me research what an anaconda was. Anaconda 2 was meh and I started to feel like it was going to be another series with multiple sequels. I have zero idea why Anaconda 3 came out. Maybe it was trying to be like Sharknado? Who freakin knows but this film didn’t need to be made. Stop the big snake movies!!
Left Behind (2014)
Oh, Nicolas Cage, there are time in your career when you made terrible ass films. Left Behind should’ve been left behind on whatever studios desk and immediately thrown into the trash. A film that is made after the famous book and fails on every single level. This film needs to be in every film making college course on what not to do from writing, editing, directing, acting and everything else.
The Glimmer Man (1996)
This film is one of the slowest moving, boring, uninteresting action films you will watch. It stars Steven Seagal as a former government intelligence agent known as “the Glimmer Man.” He becomes a detective for the LAPD and teams with Keenen Ivory Wayans’ character. There is nothing really glimmering about either lead performances or this story. You might as well spend time watching a cloud move overhead than watch this film.
