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Rating: 3.5 out of 5
Oh, Indiana Jones. Sometimes it is best to ride into the sunset. That is what you did in the Last Crusade. You rode into the sunset with your father, and two best friends after finding the legendary Holy Grail. An accomplishment that many have dreamed. Yet, after 19 years away from the spotlight. That’s right, 19 YEARS!!! You decided to grace the world once again with an adventure for the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
What do you give the world after so long away??? Almost a full two decades away from the public eye?? A film that was okay. A meh film. A film that was recycled in many ways that it seemed odd to be watching Indiana trying to run around like he was in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Indy, your life crisis needs to stop. I know you had to soak the bones, after all, you went through.
Steven Spielberg and George Lucas return with Harrison Ford to make another Indiana Jones film. After 19 years, revive a beloved hero and give him another adventure that could’ve been left in the deepest vault or at the end of the first film, in a crate where no one could find it. Crystal Skull isn’t an awful movie. It is quite entertaining to watch but its also not a great film.
Crystal Skull begins in 1957 during the Cold War. In the Nevada desert, we are introduced to the enemy. No more Nazis but the next best thing……….the Russians. Cant’s have a movie during the Cold War without the Russians as an enemy. After killing several US soldiers, they arrive at a military storage facility, where they surround a car and toss Indiana (Ford) out of the vehicle. There we are introduced to the main villain, Colonel Dr. Irina Spalko (Blanchet), a Stalin fanatic who carries around a saber. As the doors open, the location is revealed to be the infamous Area 51 and where the Ark of the Covenant resides (a subtle hint is thrown in). Ironically, the Russians don’t really care for the Ark as they want something else. They want a mummified corpse from the Roswell UFO incident. Yep, a corpse of an alien and off to races as Indiana manages to escape and somehow survive a nuclear blast! After being “let go” from his job as a professor (I guess tenure doesn’t matter), Indiana meets a greaser named Mutt Williams (LaBeouf). Williams tells Indiana that his out of touch colleague Harold Oxley (Hurt), had found a crystal skull in Peru before losing his mind and being kidnapped. Indiana gives a lecture on the crystal skull before running off and finding it while looking for Mutt’s mother (Allen). With the crystal skull in hand, Indiana and Mutt must fight against the Russians to uncover the truth about the crystal skull.
This brings us full circle now to the movie overall. The conclusion is still meh. It is one of those movies that will get you excited in some areas but also seems to try extra hard in maintaining the interest level of the audience with insane stunts and situations. The plot was interesting, to say the least. Beside artifacts like the Ark of the Covenant and the Holy Grail, I guess the next best thing is Roswell and an alien head, since that was pretty big back in the day. If you’re going to go a different route, you might as well commit fully to it.
Now the action scenes are crazy, to say the least. Now all the fighting in the warehouse, understandable. The nuclear blast at the testing site was a nice addition. It was something that went on around that time, but surviving it in a refrigerator is a whole different story. Indy should’ve been charred person or even nonexistent. What type of refrigerator is that because I need one of them? The other action scenes held the attention, but the whole South America scene was CRAZY. There was dry sandpit that looked like quicksand, monkeys, big a** man-eating ants that not even a can of Raid could be helpful, and let’s not forget waterfalls, natives, and rockets…..oh my. All of this kept your attention until we get to see some aliens. They were provided with one of the craziest explanations on why they were around.
Through all of this, somehow Harrison Ford looked pretty good doing it. At the ripe age of 64 or 65, he still managed to throw a decent punch and put on the fedora, satchel, and use that bullwhip. One of the best scenes was when he was in the warehouse, and he tried to swing with his bullwhip and completely missed the car he was aiming for. Indiana makes a comment on how it was easier before. A priceless line that should let you know it was beyond time to hang it up. It is time to hang it up, Harrison. Indiana can officially ride into the sunset. Yet, the movie does the character justice as he knows he is too old to be running around and gave him an ending that he deserves.
Even with an aged Indiana, Spielberg and Lucas thought it would be best to bring back an old favorite. The return of Marion Ravenwood was a surprise. Remember, she was Indy’s love interest in Raiders of the Lost Ark. I guess her appearance truly makes it full circle like the one that got away or he ran away from. Karen Allen played her character with less feistiness than years before. I wonder if she left her hard-drinking ways behind her. Finally, the appearance of Shia LeBeouf’s character of Mutt Williams was okay. You get subtle hints that his character could be the next Indiana Jones, but he spent his time being a greaser and didn’t go to college. He needs to do schooling to know what he is looking for.
“Crystal Skull” was a nice little addition to the Indiana Jones franchise. Was it needed? Probably not. Would the franchise be fine without this addition? Yes, it would’ve. Can the world wait another 19 years before Indiana Jones graces the scene again?? Let’s make it 38 years or even longer. No need to keep ruining a classic hero.
