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Rating: 2.5 out of 5
Dear Les Misérables,
I am not of fan of musicals, and sometimes Broadway plays. Lately, watching plays in person have been far more entertaining than the movie sometimes, and I haven’t seen that many plays. With that said, you have reminded me why I DON’T like musicals that much. You have brought back every emotion on why I really, really don’t like musicals. There are some that I like, as in Wizard of Oz, which is a classic. Mary Poppins, which is a classic. I don’t count animated movies because they are in a different category in themselves. But you, sir or ma’am, have significantly made me not want to ever want to watch another musical again. Almost three hours of my life wasted with boredom.
The movie was pretty easy to understand and follow. Pretty much it follows a former prisoner Jean Valjean (Jackman). Jean has been in jail for 19 years for stealing bread for his sister and her baby. 19 FREAKIN YEARS FOR THAT AND HARD LABOR! That is insane right there. Well, Jean finally gets his release from the watchful eye of police officer Javert (Crowe). You know how pain in the ass jailers be. Dude made him pick up this big a** plank of wood that had the flag on it before letting him bounce. Jean cannot find work, which isn’t surprising because he is an ex-con, so he makes his way to a church. The priest is good to him, but he ends up stealing almost all of the silver from the church. I don’t know how God would see that move. Jean is caught and brought back to the church, where the priest vouches for him and states he has given him the valuables. This one move sets a change in Jean. In 8 years, he becomes mayor of a town and a businessman, but the dude did skip out on parole. After almost getting caught and deciding to take care of a young girl named Cosette, whose mother, Fantine (Anne Hathaway), a former employee of his, became a prostitute and died a horrible death in the gutters after being fired. Then 9-years later, for a total of 17 years, the French Revolution flames are starting to erupt, Cosette (Seyfried) is grown and falls in love, as usual, with a passionate revolutionary named Marius (Redmayne), while Javert begins to close in again on Valjean’s secret past.
You know where this film completely lost me? Pretty much after Jean got caught for stealing and got away from it. This film was an epic bore for me. I don’t know where to begin with it. It’s not a bad movie, and I know one of my friends will jump all over my back because she was a theater major and will state that I don’t appreciate this work of art. This is NO work of art in my eyes. Not even close. I honestly don’t know what to say because I STRUGGLED to get through this film. By the middle, I was done, and was I still had over an hour to go.
First, let’s talk about the songs. There is nothing wrong with having a movie filled with songs. Hell, there isn’t even a problem with having the whole film with songs, BUT this film seemed to have more songs than anyone could count. How about like 10 songs maximum. When you go over that number, then it is time to stop. Maybe it was just me, but all the songs sounded exactly the same. I don’t know if it was people’s singing or what, but they all sounded the same. Hold up, not that cutie Samantha Barks. I see you girl. I come back to you later. The first song when everyone was pulling the ship was cool, but after that, it was time to call it a day.
Now the acting. Not much acting when you just singing. Well, you do need to act when your singing. It seemed like almost every person was trying too hard. Jackman, you actually did a decent job at it. Long was from your Wolverine days, but you held your own. Crowe, maybe you should’ve left this role alone. From the question, you asked in Gladiator, “Are you not entertained?” My answer to that question with this film is HELL NAW!! I was not entertained. Samantha Barks, you can have my number any day of the week because you were lookin so good! Your voice was sweet and beautiful! Call me, and we can go on a date anywhere! Now, as for Anne Hathaway. You were good. You brought some prominent emotion to your character, but how in the world did you win? You were only on film for like 15 minutes. Then you cut your hair, had your teeth pulled, lost some weight, and because a pro. I’ve seen that in other movies, and that actress didn’t win. I’m going to give you props because I know this role wasn’t easy for you. Even Helena Bonham Carter and Sacha Baron Cohen were in this film. Should’ve stopped at Sweeney Todd.
Honestly, the movie was good around the French Revolution scene. That is where it was at for me with this film, and as you can tell, I am an action type of person. The whole build-up, and then the shoot-out scene were good. It kept my attention until all the singing happened again. When the little boy got shot, I was like, “Oh Damn!” When homegirl got shot, I was like, “NOOOOOOOO!” Then when everyone got shot, I was like, “This happens during a revolution.” That whole act was great in my eyes and should’ve been the entire movie.
I can honestly state that this will be my first, last, and only time watching Les Misérables. If you are a musical fan, you might like it, you might not. I believe going to see the play might be worth your time because I sure did waste a lot on this one.
