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Let’s take a new direction with the movies that make you go huh. This time around we go back to the ancient times of gods, mythology and other things back in the day. No mythology is off the list as many Hollywood films tried and greatly failed at making of these films. Zeus, Odin, Set and so many other gods must sit on their throne in disappointment.
Gods of Egypt (2016)
Here is a question, can you name a movie with the Egyptian Gods? Can you name an Egyptian God? First, the Mummy Returns might be close, and some of the gods are Osiris, Set, and Ra. That’s all I got. Well, you are in luck, ladies, and gentlemen, because there is a movie with the Egyptian Gods. That movie is Gods of Egypt. Let me tell you that it was one of the worse movies I have ever seen. The Egyptian Gods should be beyond disappointed with their portrayal in this film.
10,000 BC (2008)
A movie that should’ve stayed in the prehistoric era, it was about mammoth hunters. I don’t know why anyone would care but somehow this film was a box office hit. The premise is when one of the tribe women is kidnap, the one who loves her sets out to get her back. I remember a scene with the pyramids and then the mammoths rebelling and all that crazy jazz. Nothing else needs to be said but leave this film back in the dirt.
Wrath of the Titans (2012)
The remake of Clash with the Titans was pretty good. It really didn’t need a sequel. Yet, we got a sequel and it was a shame that we had to sit and watch it. As the world started to forget about the gods, they disappeared. This film should’ve disappeared with it. The story was blah, the special effects was laughable and after a while it was a bore to watch. Fighting the Kraken would’ve been way more entertaining than this godless film.
The 13th Warrior (1999)
Sometimes a movie comes along that makes little sense nor see the light of day. Let me ask you this? What do you get when you cross an Arab Muslim traveler with Viking warriors, the tale of Beowulf but not quite the actual story, along with people that dress like bears and think they are bears? You get a crap of a movie called the 13th Warrior. Yep, a film that makes very little sense and will leave you even dumber than ever because someone thought combining multiple stories would be a great idea.
Exodus: Gods and Kings (2014)
The Ten Commandments staring Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner is usually the go to film about Moses. Well, the Ridley Scott version came around about the Exodus of the Hebrews from Egypt led by Moses and related in the Book of Exodus. Besides the visuals, the film was a disappointment to say the least. White washing at its finest. Might as well watch the Disney version of this story.
