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If there is one genre that turns out awful films, it has to be the horror genre. I love me some bad horror movies because some play to the awful cliches that plague them. Girl runs through the woods like an Olympic sprinter only to be caught and killed. Dude thinks he can take on the main killer only to be stabbed or head ripped off. Horror movies have a special place for bad films.
The Wolfman (2010)
If I could be any supernatural creature, it would be a werewolf. They are simply awesome. There have been a few adaptations of the wolfman. The 2010 version fell flat for me. Even with a cast of Benicio del Toro, Anthony Hopkins, Emily Blunt and Hugo Weaving, there were few frights. This film won’t make you howl at the moon and actually make you transform into a puppy.
I Spit on Your Grave 2 (2013)
I saw the original and thought it was a disgusting pile of shit. When they made a second one, I didn’t know why it was made. Two films depicting extreme rape is enough for this world. This film should’ve never been made and it isn’t even enjoyable to watch. This film should be burned and never see the light of day.
See No Evil (2014)
I wish I could say that I didn’t see any evil when watching this film. Starring the Big Red Machine from WWE, Kane, this film failed miserably. Kane plays a reclusive maniac who terrorizes a group of young petty criminals who are in community service while cleaning up a hotel. The film is unimaginative as it is so many other films combined that it is mind numbing. I was choked slammed by the dumbness of this film.
The Cave (2005)
This film should’ve stayed deep in the cave and never seen the light of day. A film that had a pretty good cast that became well known later on, it follows a group of cave-divers and scientists who explore a cave system only to be attached by deadly creatures. The idea was good but the execution was horrible. One of the major problems is that you were not invested in any of the characters. The ending was blah and cliché. Good thing the Decent came a few years later.
Wishmaster (1997)
I don’t know about you but when Aladdin came out, I wanted a friend like the fun loving Genie. I also saw Wishmaster and decided that I really don’t want to meet a djinn. A djinn is a wish-granting, evil genie. Wishmaster is a “horror” film where a djinn is freed and wants a woman to make three wishes to enslave the Earth or something in that real. There are zero horrors in this film and you might sit around and scratch your head wondering if you could wish for it to stop.
