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What horrors can you find in the night? What spooks will scare you into submission? What films will make your skin crawl and give you goosebumps? The films I am about to give you will do none of that. They will leave you confused, dumbfounded and maybe a little more less intelligent. Welcome to another installment of bad horror films.
Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986)
The first Poltergeist was good. Some didn’t like it but it was good and I think it is a classic. The sequel is an unwanted trash of a film. Can you leave the family and little girl alone. This time the film hit us with a strange ass cult preacher that seemed to sweat more than Niagara Falls. The film wasn’t scary at all and what the hell was that ending? Flying through the sky and lord knows what was happening.
Idle Hands (1999)
This film is by far one of the stupidest movies I have seen and I have seen a lot of stupid movies. The plot follows a lazy ass teenage stoner whose hand becomes possessed and goes on a killing spree. It is like if Thing from the Addams Family decides to kill everyone. The film made zero sense and should be buried deep in the ground. This film had a few stars back in the day. Good thing some of their careers survived.
The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996)
What the hell was this film? I know it was a remake but what the hell was this shit? It was a mess of a film and so very bad. It was like no one tried in this film. Brando seemed to show up and was like, let me talk crazy for a while and then I’m out. Turning people into animals was crazy to look at but it quickly lost it appeal. Val Kilmer, what was that?
Darkness Falls (2003)
Darkness didn’t fall fast enough on this film. A story about a vengeful spirit who was brutally murdered 150 years before the start of the film. The person was a kind old woman who gave a coin to kids resembling the tooth fairy and shit went wrong. Now the spirit comes for the last tooth before adulthood and if you see her, you will die. The whole film is an absolute mess and bore with ZERO scares. You can actually predict when a fright will come and then laugh at it.
Black Christmas (2006)
Can we have a decent Christmas? Black Christmas was a remake that no one asked for. The original was pretty good but low and behold, when a remake is made, it manages to mess it up and just show gruesome deaths more than anything else. This film is a waste of time and a waste of perfectly good Christmas spirit.
