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Rating: 2 out of 5
For years, I’ve heard the Blair Witch Project is supposed to be one of the scariest and intense films around. That the “found footage” aspect and the handheld camera made it one of the most iconic films to watch. Many put it on par with The Exorcist and other great horror movies. The curiosity and intrigue were really high for me as I have never seen this movie, but also I was skeptical. My uncle LOVED horror movies, and he said it was one of the worse horror movies he had ever seen, and yet I decided to give it a chance.
So let me get this correct. We have three students by the names of Heather Donahue, Michael Williams, and Joshua Leonard. They are filmmakers, and they set out to shoot a documentary about a local legend, the Blair Witch. Now, let’s stop right here for a second. Just the name alone sounds crazy, and why even decide to do a documentary on this. You couldn’t find something else to film. Fine, so we learn that the legend is in the woods near Burkittsville, Maryland. Many children have vanished in the 1940s, and people still avoid going too deep into the woods. Okay, let’s stop here for a second and once again talk for a second. Now when kids vanish back in the day, and you go looking for facts, then you need to slap. Only dumb people would go looking for something like that. Okay, so the party sets out and looks for facts while interviewing people. They equipped themselves with two cameras and little hiking gear—stupid decision. First, things are calm until they find small piles of stone that they think have been arranged. We spend like five minutes looking at rocks for no point and screaming. Then they learn that they are lost somehow. After that, things try to get spooky as they hear eerie sounds at night and more piles of stones in places where they have not been before. Listen, this film could’ve been over if they walked in one direction and made it to civilization, but we spend our time hearing yelling and the oh my god, what is that sound talk. What usually happens? Someone goes missing, and then we have to see the film of the dude staring at the wall. How about leaving his ass there and being out?
Well, after watching it, I want to officially say that I wasn’t impressed at all while. Really?? White people running around the woods lost while screaming and running for their lives. How about you roll up into some dangerous parts of the country, and then you can scream. Not this pathetic mess of a movie. Really? People got scared over this.
Over half the movie, you couldn’t make out what was going on because the camera was either looking at the sky or ground while people were running around. The other half of the movie was the three prominent people arguing that either they are lost, someone is stupid because they lost the map, or Josh is gone. I got so tired of them yelling for Josh that I wanted to turn off the movie. Throughout the film, we get the stick figures. Here is my question? Where be the witch? Show me her spirit or something!
I still can’t believe that people got terrified from this movie. Then we come to the scene where the girl was crying and the camera all up in her nose. Cool, you scared, and you think you are going to die and want to make your last statements. Is that nerve-racking? Of course, but the way this was made was blah. I can go to some area with my cheap ass phone and start screaming and yelling at night. I know no one will come to save me, and I can add in some gunshots, car alarms, and dogs barking. I might be able to have a cat meow also.
Maybe it is just me, but I was very unimpressed by this film. The sense of horror and frights just wasn’t there for me. The whole found footage atmosphere was entertaining but if I can’t see anything, keep that stuff buried. Also, all the arguing cut me off from the movie. At least show me someone getting taken rather than them staring at the wall. There are FAR better horror movies than this one. I might give myself a year and then try to watch this film all over again.
