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Rating: 4 out of 5
When I was in elementary school, I had the opportunity to watch The Dark Crystal. Back then, I thought it was one of the weirdest movies I had seen. Since I am older now, let me be real. The Dark Crystal was some of the strangest-looking shit I saw at a young age. You couldn’t tell me all those creatures looked weird and creepy. This comes from someone who saw Star Wars, but at least those were aliens and space. The Dark Crystal had creatures that looked like from nightmares. I could go on, but I must give you a high-quality review.
The Dark Crystal dropped on the world in 1982 and is still strong today. The film is a dark fantasy that came from the mind of two unique and visionary people. The first one is the iconic Mr. Jim Henson. If you don’t know, Mr. Henson is the one behind the freakin Muppets. You know the crew: Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Gonzo, Animal, and the rest of the crew. Then there is Frank Oz, who I saw getting inducted as a Disney Legend. Mr. Oz is a puppeteer who has done the damn thing with his work of making many or all of the Sesame Street characters and Star Wars. The man designed freakin Yoda. The greatest Jedi of all time.
What is the Dark Crystal about? Let me give you a little lowdown on it. A thousand years before the story on the planet Thra, there are three suns: the Great Sun, the Rose Sun, and the Dying Sun. The land is full of life with many creatures and ruled by the urSkeks (still don’t know how to say that name). The urSkeks are the guardians of the giant-ass crystal called the Crystal of Truth. The crystal is technically the planet’s life force, and when the three suns hit simultaneously, they make a beam and spread whatever great life (i.e., the Great Conjunction). The urSkeks seemed to get greedy and cracked the Crystal of Truth, causing a shard to pop out. Not a big deal, right? WRONG! The urSkeks are split into two races. The first race is the turtle movie, hunchbacked, humming, and peaceful Mystics. They represent the good side of the urSkeks. The evil side or Dr. Jekyll are the freakin Skeksis. They are vulture-looking, skinny legs, and dress up in all types of clothes horrors. At that moment, the Skeksis looked around, told the Mistics to get off their lawn, and took control of the world, which brought pain, fear, and death. These dudes HATED an elf-like race called Gelflings because they are prophesized to restore the crystal and end the Skeksis’ reign of terror. Boom, got it so far?
That brings us to the story. The Gelflings are pretty much gone, extinct, and no longer around from the Skeksis killing all. But WAIT! Living among the Mystics is Jen, a young Gelfling whose parents were killed. The Master Mystic raises Jen and tells him about the crystal, the journey of repairing it, and how he needs to get the missing piece from Aughra. When the Master Mystic dies, Jen bounces to find the shard before the Great Conjunction. He rolls up to Aughra’s Observatory and meets the famous woman or creature. Aughra is like Yoda but is old as hell. She’s been around FOREVER and might be like Gaia for the planet. Well, Jen gets the shard and, on his way, meets Kira, another Gelfling with wings and a fine-ass girl. The pair go through some shit and, in the end, manage to do things.
I kind of gave most of my review in the beginning. You must have an imagination to think of and make this film. Many people didn’t like this film, but I found it interesting. If it were to come on today, I would watch it because it is crazy to watch. Thinking about the film, I must give it to Henson and Oz for doing something new. They made the Muppets and Sesame Street, which are extremely kid friendly. I feel like with this film, they wanted to show the evil side of the world and beings. Look at the freakin Skeksis! They were wicked, and the world they produced showed how they drained life and happiness from the world. We need movies to show the dark side of creatures and break the norm of happy films.
As far as a fantasy film goes, this movie might be in the top 100 of fantasy films. The most in-your-face aspects are the visuals and characters. Some of the creatures that Henson and Oz thought of were straight out of a nightmare. I was all about it. Aughra looks like a big mama who would scold you, fix you a great meal, and tell you you’re terrific. What about those walking, longed-leg creatures that Jen and Kira rolled up on. No, thank you. Yet, the creatures are the things that take away from the story because you’re focused on those things. Thinking of the Mystics and Skeksis, I liked how the Skeksis had different personalities from each other.
The story was a little meh. As I have gotten older, it is one of those stories that has been done many times. Maybe not in 1982, but now it’s meh. I’ll give it a pass because it was something new in terms of puppet movies. The only puppet that would survive in this world is Yoda. The film is about a child who must save the world before a certain time. What I liked was the setup of the film. I liked how powerful godlike beings got greedy, and when the crystal cracked, they were split between their good and evil sides. It was mostly a standard story without any real substance. Even the crystal was in the film for like 3 minutes.
As far as the characters go, the film makes some prominent, and others take up space. First, the main characters, Jen and Kira, were okay. I really didn’t feel anything for them. I was more excited to see them trying to survive. They did have this one scene where they connected, but it was like a simple memory scene.
Honestly, the Mystics are a non-factor in this film. They didn’t do shit. The Skeksis were the primary part, but even among them, only two really stood out. They had an intense scene between the General and the Chamberlian. I already talked about big mama Aughra. She told it how it was and moved on. Everyone was scared of her.
The Dark Crystal is one of those films you will like or go meh with. As a kid’s film, it showed the darker side of characters. If you are looking for a quick version of this movie, Robot Chicken had a skit on it with none other than T-Pain singing without autotune. I think you will laugh at the skit. Hey, watch some creepy creatures in a creepy story by two of the best puppet masters to walk this earth.
BONUS CLIP!!!
