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How many of you know about Henry VIII? I first learned about the famous king while watching The Tudors. If you want a really great lesson on Henry VIII, watch OverSimplified on YouTube. His videos are amazing and a fantastic lesson on history. He just needs to put out more videos. I also had the opportunity to travel to London, which was awesome. I visited the Tower of London with a tour guide who explained a lot about British history. Henry VII was at the forefront in the beginning. Sorry, I went off on a mini tangent.
If you don’t know about Henry VIII, he was King of England from 22 April 1509 until he died in 1547. Henry VIII is known for two things during his reign. The one that sent shockwaves through the known world was when he disagreed with the Pope, through the deuces and initiated the English Reformation by separating the Church of England from papal authority. He didn’t even stop there. He named himself Supreme Head of the Church of England and dissolved all convents and monasteries in his realm. Pretty much, he threw up the middle finger at the Pope and told him to kick rocks.
Henry VIII is probably best known for having six wives. Yes, dude was like most of these celebrities who marry and then get divorced. Six wives? I’m out here and can’t even get a girlfriend. Now that I think about it, who wants to go through the endless process of marriage and divorce? I think I’ll stick with my turtle. He’s loyal and my little boy. PSA: Get a turtle. They are loyal and will live a long time.
The Private Life of Henry VIII is a British biographical drama directed by Alexander Korda. The film focuses not on the reign of the famous king but on his marriages. There is enough drama in his marriages to have a mini-series. The film is credited with creating the popular and most used image of Henry VIII as a man who went from stud to being fat, gluttonous, and loves his turkey legs and 6000 calories. Dude would’ve lived at McDonald’s or Popeye’s.
The film starts 20 years into King Henry VIII’s (Laughton) reign. The film covers all his marriages, which go by fast in this 97-minute film. Each marriage is presented in a comedic way. First, the movie skips over his first marriage to Catherine of Aragon because she was a respectable woman, in the words of the title. So now we are down to the final five wives after he divorces her. On to Anne Boleyn (Oberon)! The film starts here in 1536 as Anne prepares to be executed. Gawd Damn is that vicious. I guess we are on to his third wife, Jane Seymour (Barrie). Life seems good for the king, and when Jane becomes pregnant, he is on cloud nine. Tragedy strikes when Jane dies during childbirth.
On to wife #4, aka Anne of Cleves (Lanchester). This is the part of the film that I believe was the best and funniest. Anne doesn’t want to marry Henry, so homegirl devises a plan to make herself as unattractive as possible. Henry still marries her, but during the night, they play cards, and during it, Anne manages to hustle Henry out of a lot of good properties before agreeing to a divorce.
Here we go to wife #5, the beautiful and ambitious Katherine Howard (Barnes). This is a fascinating portrayal of the famous wife. In real life, Katherine was like 14 when she married Henry, who was around 49. That is pretty nasty dude. Katherine was immature and a kid. In the film, Katherine wants nothing to do with love until she marries Henry, and then she becomes smitten with Thomas Culpeper. Henry tries to show he is still a young buck and even wrestles a dude. He also eats like a pig and throws those turkey legs over his shoulder. Katherine’s love affair is discovered because the two couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Henry has them executed. On to wife #6 and the final one.
I don’t know what it was, but this marriage was depressing. It only took up the final 5-10 minutes of the film. Henry marries Catherine Parr (Gregg), who seems like a bigger tyrant than he is. She berates him for his love of turkey legs and even has the guards take them away. When Parr leaves, Henry looks at the camera and, in a hilarious statement, says, “Six wives, and the best of them’s the worst.” Poor Henry. Well, maybe not.
This film put Charles Laughton in a new stratosphere of stardom. His portrayal as the legendary king was hilarious but impactful. It is the one that many people equate to the king, with being fat, loud, full of himself, and his love of turkey legs that he tossed over his shoulder. Laughton won the Best Actor award for this role, and he earned it. He went hard in the paint for this role, and the image of him as the king will live on forever. This was the first time a foreigner won an Academy Award.
The Private Life of Henry VIII is a funny film that makes fun of Henry VIII and his marriages. It may not be the most accurate story about the king, but it gets across the point of how wives lived and survived. Laughton is amazing in his role and needs to be applauded. This film needs to be honored as the first foreign film to be nominated for Best Picture. Take some time to learn about the famous king and all his wives.
